Someone got a new pair of glasses. #frenchbulldog
"Do not eat." Bought a new coat and found this in the pocket. Our society is not built to last.
Obviously I bought some. #bacon
Letter to Santa.
"In dreams, I would see grand visions of lefse." #BenDreamsOfLefse
I’m acquiring mass. #oreos
The rate at which I’ve been eating cupcakes is not sustainable.
"I don’t want to sleep with Fuller. He wets the bed. He’ll pee all over me."
I’m thankful for apple pie.
The iPhone auto corrects “yolo” to “tool.”
I bought this domain immediately after witnessing a grown man eat my appetizer that was delivered to the wrong table.
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